Cosmopolitan dating articles Sexchatsfree
"If there weren't any feelings, it would be merely a hookup.""It is a hella annoying whisper of a step below official boyfriend/girlfriend thing," Chelsea*, 22, explained."There's an emotional bond and fulfillment that mimics monogamous relationships."But situationships, while often seen as an inevitable stepping stone into real relationships, are problematic by nature. The emotional aspect (however slight) differentiates it from a no-strings-attached hookup.When I was in college, I met a guy at a bar and started hooking up with him.He'd take me out to dinner with his friends and coworkers, I stayed at his place four nights a week, I even kept a toothbrush there, and it wasn't weird.A situationship, he explained, was the catch-all term for those relationships sitting at the intersection of “hooking up” and “in a relationship.” It’s a scary precipice, teeter-tottering between “more than hooking up” and “very much dating,” where a simple “what are we” can throw the entire system out of balance. For all the boyfriends that were never really my boyfriend, past hookups and their mealy scars of things left unsaid, there was now a clever umbrella term: situationships.And getting involved in a situationship might be the worst thing you can do to yourself.The hope of something more is always there, dangling like a carrot over every late night "U up? While legit relationships are built on clear communication and understanding, situationships are built on the absence of them. There's at least a layer of mutual respect in no-strings-attached hookups.
Since their schedule is just ~too busy~, their ideas of dates include inviting you to a bar where, oh wow, *their* team is currently playing and it’s suuuuuch a tight game!There are few things in life that can make you feel as stupid as crying over a boyfriend you couldn't even call your boyfriend.It's one thing to be upset when your official partner has disappointed you, but when it's someone who won't even admit that the "dates" you've been going on constitutes as "dating," you feel doubly dumb.Ever since, I have no idea how to refer to our time together.
The only label I felt safe enough to use in front of him that expressed my feelings was "crush," but that minimized almost everything about our interactions.
For all the ink that's been spilled about how toxic casual hookup culture is, situationships are a lot more destructive. You can't be angry or sad, or even comfortably summarize to your friends that you got dumped, because you weren't really dating in the first place.